DRAIN YOU
We won, which was great, we’re top, which is great, we shut down a very decent attacking side, which is also great and yet … Is anyone else finding all this draining?
The stench around the league, the pyramid and the entire industry?
The regulator’s report, published last week, told us 60 percent of clubs in the EFL and the National League are technically insolvent. They didn’t, however. actually propose doing anything about it. If 6 percent of my house was on fire, I’d dial 999, let alone 60.
YET STILL THEY COME
The crowd was 2,398, almost double the next highest in the league, the 1,266 that watched TikTube Project Dagenham & Redbridge crash to defeat at Farnborough. Did it feel like a big game? Frankly no. There wasn’t much of an atmosphere, which was perhaps because the authorities didn’t think it was worth giving their supporter the entire segregated area.
Maidenhead had a bit of a shithouse vibe. Black and white stripes don’t clash with amber, but they wore a Man City tribute outfit; and they weren’t dirty exactly, but there was a lot of grappling.
Four minutes in, we scored, Gravata reacting quickest in the area to stretch a leg out and steer in Ken Charles’ flick on. Some of us cheered, although around 20 radicalised foetuses responded by singing “We Want Ash Out”. What’s the thought process here? We’re top of the league, against all expectations and this is how you react when we score. When Maidenhead’s fan sang “Bang your drums and fuck off home,” I nearly joined in.
Umerah nearly equalised when he hit the bar and Charles then produced a nice bit of skill and took out two players, but fluffed the finish, prompting someone in the Elvis End to yell “get him off” and tell him he was “absolutely fucking useless”.
What’s the thought process here? Well let’s not go there right now …
Gravata was then taken out off the ball. He went down, as players do, and after a lengthy delay the ball was kicked out of play. The physios initially signalled he’d be ok, but soon limped off. Lusala had an effort clawed away by the keeper but, if anything, they looked marginally stronger towards the end of the half.
WE DIDN’T START THE FIRE
Billy Joel’s anthem for the jaded played during the half-time interval. A banger, but probably not one for a dressing room you’re trying to inspire to go out there and pop a bollock for you.
Luckily this year’s squad of players seem untarred by cynicism and full of energy. Four minutes after the restart it was 2-0, with Foran steering in a Court corner that had somehow been allowed to bounce in the area.
They hit back with a very well-worked goal, which Coley finished from the edge of the box, but then nothing much happened, which was a tribute to just how well we shut them down. We created a few half-chances and the scoreboard froze (again) on 80 minutes, but there were no real alarms. The one final chance they had to draw level came in stoppage time when they were awarded a free kick just inside the Maidstone half, but they lined everyone up for a cross to the far side of the box, only to punt the ball harmlessly to Lenny Holden.
PROMISED YOU A MIRACLE
Craig Fagan was rightly happy with the performance and thinks Maidenhead will be up there at the end of the season, although the loud booing coming from the Elvis End after the final whistle suggests their fan disagrees.
Will we be up there? Somehow, in a league where there are clubs chasing the Premier League dream, we’re top. And somehow, immediately below us, are the team formerly known as Gravesend & Northfleet, a club who were knocking on heaven’s door barely a month ago. We play them on Tuesday week. How is the rational fan supposed to feel about this? It’s a bit like when a player rolls around on the floor in agony and then suddenly comes to life. Yea, for he is risen. It really must be a miracle.
